The Gospel according to Laugh-In

In honor of Sunday's Gospel, here's a somewhat more light-hearted translation (HT to the NPM user-group e-mail broadcast):

Updated 9/19 with correct title and College for author Timothy Fulop - Thanks, Genie Addleton

Prodigal Son in Key of F

Feeling footloose and frisky, a featherbrained fellow forced his fond father to fork over his farthings. He flew far to foreign fields and frittered his fortune, feasting fabulously with faithless friends.
Finally facing famine and fleeced by his fellows-in-folly, he found himself a feed flinger in a filthy farmyard. Fairly famished, he fain would have filled his frame with foraged food from the fodder fragments. "Fooey, my father's flunkies fare far fancier," the frazzled fugitive fumed feverishly, frankly facing facts.
Frustrated by failure and filled with foreboding, he fled forthwith to his family. Falling at his father's feet, he floundered forlornly, "Father, I have flunked and fruitlessly forfeited family favor." But the faithful father, forestalling further flinching, frantically flagged the flunkies to fetch forth the finest fatling and fix a feast.
The fugitive's fraternal faultfinder frowned on the fickle forgiveness of former folderol. His fury flashed, but fussing was futile. The farsighted father figured, "Such filial fidelity is fine, but what forbids fervent festivity for the fugitive is found. Unfurl the flags with flaring, let fun and frolic freely flow. Former failure is forgotten, folly forsaken. Forgiveness forms the foundation for future fortune."

Author: Timothy E. Fulop is Vice-President for Academic Affairs and Dean, Lakeland College